What does that mean anyway?

I’ve been home a lot during the day and listening to talk radio while I work. I love New Life Live, a call-in discussion show about relationships, love, life, addictions…you name it and these people are pretty much equipped to talk to you about it.
Almost every day there is a call about someone whose marriage is in trouble. Or they’re reeling from divorce, or they don’t know what to do with the current boyfriendalways women, men rarely seem to take these questions public. Tonight at the gym I flipped past the Suze Orman show and for some reason I stopped. Suze was trying to get the whole story from an emotional, beautiful, exotic woman who met her husband at 18, married, and years later discovered his massive, crushing debt.
 
Watching this segment I heard the phrase that, as a Christian woman, raises my hackles: “You need to support me.” It was her husband telling her that she needed to follow him into yet another money making scam, since she had the good credit that would get them qualified.
 
As a husband – as a MAN – I can’t tell you how important it is for you to be someone who is worthy of support.

 
Trust me, you will come up with a thousand harebrained ideas to get you out of whatever trouble you are in over the course of your lifetime. And after you graduate from college you are not cute enough, charming enough, or persuasive enough to pull any of them off. You can be coy, threatening, or George Clooney, but until you get over your own idea of yourself, and respect the reality of the life you are living with someone else, it’s all manipulative garbage.
 
Will she help you? Maybe.
Will she hate it? Probably.
Will she respect you? Absolutely not.

By the time most women have been married six months our BS sensors are finely tuned. No matter how many different ways you say “This is a great opportunity” if we are hesitant there is good reason.
 
Should we support the men in our world? Absolutely. 

Men need that from women in a way we can never understand and just need to accept. But guys, don’t expect us to blindly follow you behind every rainbow.

There is a reason why we’re in your life, and its may just be to protect you from yourself. Stop. Let her talk. Listen.

Now go away for a day and really THINK about what she said – not who she is or how she said it. If that same advice came from your father, your best friend, or Kate Beckinsale how would you take it? 

Then think again before you tell the women in your life that she just really needs to support you.  There’s a reason why she isn’t.
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